Those troubling doubts

Today was a really hard day. Though I can’t go into specifics at this time (and you will all find out why soon enough), I can tell you something I realized (or re-realized ha). Hopefully this will encourage someone else the way that it did for me ❤

There are moments in your life that you need to make important decisions. The Christian should be committed to pouring prayer out for these decisions. Well, recently Jamie and I faced one of these. After fasting and praying the decision was made and we were confirmed over and over that our decision was in accordance to the Lords will. It was amazing actually.

However, with every decision you have consequences to some degree. Sometimes, after making a godly choice, challenges come. These difficulties can test your faith. Unfortunately, hardships can also make you second guess the truth. That is what started with me, I could feel doubt creep into my heart. I found myself focusing on the negatives… on the things I may have to give up to be obedient to the Lord.

Then I read my Bible. Isn’t the Lord so wonderful? I love when something is on my heart and then the answer seems to jump right out in a sermon, from my devotions/scripture reading, or even a worship song… I love it! Anyway…I found myself in a passage about a man who had a demon-possessed son. The disciples tried to cast it out and could not. The demon caused the boy to convulse violently, causing bodily harm.

21 And He asked his father, “How long has this been happening to him?” And he said, “From childhood. 22 It has often thrown him both into the fire and into the water to destroy him. But if You can do anything, take pity on us and help us!” 23 And Jesus said to him, “‘If You can?’ All things are possible to him who believes.” 24 Immediately the boy’s father cried out and said, “I do believe; help my unbelief.”   MARK 9:21-24

This man sought after Jesus to help his son. I can imagine he was pretty desperate. Then the disciples couldn’t help! Frustration must have set in, because then the arguing ensues. When the man finally comes  face to face with Jesus, he seems to have lost some hope that his child could be healed. When Jesus confronts his doubt the man acknowledges his need for faith.

Sometimes when things don’t go quite the way we expect we can question God. We second guess the things we knew to be true. If you are a Christian and you are living for the Lord, the struggles will come. But when they do, cling to Christ. Praise Him for the good work He is doing in you.

Not only that, but we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance,and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us. ROMANS 5:3-5

Remember, times will come up that you can make a choice between doing what is right and doing what is easy. Stick with your convictions, and ask Christ to renew your strength. Remind yourself of what we know to be true, and pray that the Lord will increase your faith more. Lord I believe, help my unbelief. 

I hope this post makes sense, it is hard to be clear when I haven’t addressed what is really going on. So, my friends and family… I leave you with this:

A week from today, I will announce our surprise. All I can say is a big change is coming to the Ezzell home!

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Our Story … time to catch up!

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Hi there friends and family!! Blogging is something I always wanted to try… especially when Jamie and I tied the knot just over 2 years ago. So, here we are. I hope to keep you in loop with the many adventures we encounter in the Ezzell family. I think it is only fitting to start this thing off with where it began.

Jamie and I met in August of 2007. His interest was peaked right away, though I hate to say he was just another face of many I had met in my brother dorm that day. Eventually, we became friends and grew closer as the Lord orchestrated events in my life to rely more on our friendship. When Jamie told me how he felt about me I was shocked. He was so handsome, clever, and godly I was sure he was out of my league.

I was reluctant about dating, but Jamie was not going to give up easily. He was so sure of us every step of the way, and that confidence encouraged me. By October we were falling in love. It’s hard to believe that was 5 years ago.

Since then, we both graduated from Liberty University (Jamie in 2008 and I in 2010). Jamie proposed on my birthday (March 16th) and we were married October 23rd of that year (2010). Jamie has been working as a Customer Service Manager at Lowes Foods and I have been working my bootay off as a full time nanny (for the same family for 2 years now). Along the way we adopted two adorable pomeranian pups (Lucy in March 2011 and Molly in August 2012) and we are crazy about them!

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Jamie is still working toward his masters of divinity, and with a full time job and full time school, we aren’t left with much extra time. However, we also serve at our church. We started with children and now we teach the high school every Sunday morning. Though we don’t have as much time to give as we would like, it is evident that this is where our heart is.

We have been very blessed, and we are at a great place. Our marriage has only grown stronger, especially since we have gotten serious about praying together and doing devotions as a couple. My heart swells with love when I gaze up at my husband. He is so strong, so handsome, so godly, so… out of my league. How did I get someone like that? I don’t deserve Jamie’s love but God blesses me with it anyway.Oh wait, Christ has renewed me. He loves me so much that he took the blame for my sin and gave me his righteousness. I am becoming who God created me to be, and that is beautiful.